Recently I had been quite boring so I decided to reinstalled one of the social app where people can tell type out anything they want and people can reply or to like what they posted in anonymous status. Then, I posted my current situations and I got a few reply and in coming messages, which I feel great. Then there's this guy who came and understand my situation and we are kind of exchanging our life stories. Mon, passed. Tues, passed and right until Fri that is today, he left the city and we might not able to chat anymore. Well, he needs a friend but not me. I am sorry!
Sometimes, you feel strange where you can just talk about everything with a stranger instead of a good friend. Well, because you are not afraid of them judging you and the stranger feel free to give any comment or opinion. Do you had or have a stranger friend?
We did not manage to meet each other, maybe in the future or let it remain beautiful in the memories of 2016.
p/s: I will remember what you had taught and told me. Thanks!
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Going to neighbor country soon. Hopefully can meet my bro there.
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Not doing well in my work.. I feel super unmotivated and unproductive 😞
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I was shocked when I realized yesterday there was more than 100 views. That's incredible 🙀 It motivates me to write more 🖖🏽
Thanks everyone!
Enjoy your day (:
Friday, September 30, 2016
Tuesday, September 20, 2016
Arguments
Back to reality life. Today nothing much accomplished, tomorrow need to work really hard. Boss must be disappointing right now. Sorry!
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I should have wrong at the same time but I couldn't see where is it. Please help me realize what is my mistake as I always feel is other party. Gosh! I already give way so much and I explained it endless times but still can't understand. Be it what you say, I'm ugly, someone who doesn't put in any effort, talk too much and closed minded. Then what else can I say? You can't even give me a min of your precious life. Sometimes I regret the thing that I gave but people don't appreciate. But, that's their matter. Argh! Feeling so hurt but someone word just keep cutting my heart again and again that's because I'm stupid enough to let other hurts me. Fool. I don't know what to do now.
No talk then no argument at all, but no connection at all.
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Though life!
Almost used up all my money 😭😭
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Would you give way even when you know is not your fault? Maybe?
Just to save the relationship (be it kindship or friendship).
fannen
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I should have wrong at the same time but I couldn't see where is it. Please help me realize what is my mistake as I always feel is other party. Gosh! I already give way so much and I explained it endless times but still can't understand. Be it what you say, I'm ugly, someone who doesn't put in any effort, talk too much and closed minded. Then what else can I say? You can't even give me a min of your precious life. Sometimes I regret the thing that I gave but people don't appreciate. But, that's their matter. Argh! Feeling so hurt but someone word just keep cutting my heart again and again that's because I'm stupid enough to let other hurts me. Fool. I don't know what to do now.
No talk then no argument at all, but no connection at all.
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Though life!
Almost used up all my money 😭😭
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Would you give way even when you know is not your fault? Maybe?
Just to save the relationship (be it kindship or friendship).
fannen
Thursday, September 15, 2016
Mooncake Festival
It's the 15th day of the eighth month is lunar calendar. I miss playing with lanterns when I was a kid. I not fancy about my adulthood. Ah, time flies. I wish I could manage to own a space and I can do anything I like, but not that soon. Well, I just had a few bites of jelly mooncake by my hometown's neighbor. She is really such a kind lady. Doesn't has the atmosphere of mooncake festival.
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I make the wrong decision today. Ah, I should have follow my parents back to hometown since tomorrow is a holiday, a another long weekend. Gosh! I just managed to spent a little time with time. Feeling thankful that they came all the way from hometown and bought durian! My favorite fruits. Mom is so caring and loving. I wish I could have enjoy holidays with family.
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I had completed my very first puzzle that own by me 🖖🏽 one thousand pieces but boss said it right, I should have buy a larger one. Budget wise, maybe next month I'll go get another bigger one since the discount will last until next month.
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When someone take you for granted, what would you do? Forgive them? What if it's not about one or two times but always?
I feel like I'm an idiot. The cycle keeps going and I still believe in that person. Sometimes I feel like I'm mistreated but I still... sigh! Biggest mistake in life is to know you. Not saying that I'm good but I think I should stop thinking and doing so much until people can't see my existence. I can't just sitting there and wait and wait but nothing really works out. Doing so much things that doesn't give any better consequences.
fannen is useless.
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I make the wrong decision today. Ah, I should have follow my parents back to hometown since tomorrow is a holiday, a another long weekend. Gosh! I just managed to spent a little time with time. Feeling thankful that they came all the way from hometown and bought durian! My favorite fruits. Mom is so caring and loving. I wish I could have enjoy holidays with family.
--
I had completed my very first puzzle that own by me 🖖🏽 one thousand pieces but boss said it right, I should have buy a larger one. Budget wise, maybe next month I'll go get another bigger one since the discount will last until next month.
When someone take you for granted, what would you do? Forgive them? What if it's not about one or two times but always?
I feel like I'm an idiot. The cycle keeps going and I still believe in that person. Sometimes I feel like I'm mistreated but I still... sigh! Biggest mistake in life is to know you. Not saying that I'm good but I think I should stop thinking and doing so much until people can't see my existence. I can't just sitting there and wait and wait but nothing really works out. Doing so much things that doesn't give any better consequences.
fannen is useless.
Tuesday, September 6, 2016
Me? no title yet.
Today out of sudden I think of there's no title to address my current age. I am no longer a girl (too young to call me that). As for 'lady', I'm not at the class yet and for 'woman' it would be in later life or to say it's too generous.
Then, I feel like I should enjoy my current state because everything is so fresh and energize. How to address a female at her early 20's? I should have google on it. Hmm, no answer. I feel happy for a moment. It makes me feel like I am a real free-man. I can do anything I want and bear the consequence by myself. I am responsible for my very own act. Even thou financially is still not stable but God's grace is sufficient. "Let's celebrate!!"
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I started to miss my best friend. So long time we didn't chat. I think this is the longest time in my memory that we didn't even text. It is weird that I want him to text but I did not want as well. Well, 'commitment' is a big word. Maybe guy have their own way of committing in certain matters that they really want. I don't know, because I am not a male. I am trying but it is hard.
Perhaps, I am overly attached and it makes it getting more and more worse. It is hard not to think of someone whom you are obsessed with. Real HARD! It is like trying to forget who you are. I also start missing my family. Really hard for us to meet. No way to express...
miss you always.
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Okay, sorry for being emo (down). that's me!
Then, I feel like I should enjoy my current state because everything is so fresh and energize. How to address a female at her early 20's? I should have google on it. Hmm, no answer. I feel happy for a moment. It makes me feel like I am a real free-man. I can do anything I want and bear the consequence by myself. I am responsible for my very own act. Even thou financially is still not stable but God's grace is sufficient. "Let's celebrate!!"
--
I started to miss my best friend. So long time we didn't chat. I think this is the longest time in my memory that we didn't even text. It is weird that I want him to text but I did not want as well. Well, 'commitment' is a big word. Maybe guy have their own way of committing in certain matters that they really want. I don't know, because I am not a male. I am trying but it is hard.
Perhaps, I am overly attached and it makes it getting more and more worse. It is hard not to think of someone whom you are obsessed with. Real HARD! It is like trying to forget who you are. I also start missing my family. Really hard for us to meet. No way to express...
miss you always.
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Okay, sorry for being emo (down). that's me!
Thursday, September 1, 2016
Just a little will do...
At times, you need a little confidence to try out something new. Little bit of help in what you are doing. Simple greets. A small action like a pat on the shoulder. Rest in midday. Received random gift.
For me, all we need is to be a little more considerate. I feel like we are lacking of getting to notice others and more selfish, is not all the people but some that I saw throughout my life. Well, I'm not saying I'm a good person who have a good observation skill but it's a life long learning process. Each time you saw, you learned. People might say love is more important but not for all. Being considerate might not involve love, agree? Sometimes you do something extra just because you don't want to get yourself into trouble (that's self-protection). You buy your friend a gift for certain occasion just because he or she do so previously (that's in terms of manner) but does love comes in? I don't think so 😁 Being more considerate comes from many aspects.
Love is another whole new level. It is not as easy as being just considerate. It involves sacrifices, hearts, feelings and so forth.
It's been a cloudy day. Raining started in the evening and it's time to snuggle in the mattress and sleep.
Have a nice there people out there!
Peace 🖖🏽
For me, all we need is to be a little more considerate. I feel like we are lacking of getting to notice others and more selfish, is not all the people but some that I saw throughout my life. Well, I'm not saying I'm a good person who have a good observation skill but it's a life long learning process. Each time you saw, you learned. People might say love is more important but not for all. Being considerate might not involve love, agree? Sometimes you do something extra just because you don't want to get yourself into trouble (that's self-protection). You buy your friend a gift for certain occasion just because he or she do so previously (that's in terms of manner) but does love comes in? I don't think so 😁 Being more considerate comes from many aspects.
Love is another whole new level. It is not as easy as being just considerate. It involves sacrifices, hearts, feelings and so forth.
It's been a cloudy day. Raining started in the evening and it's time to snuggle in the mattress and sleep.
Have a nice there people out there!
Peace 🖖🏽
Tuesday, August 30, 2016
Forgetful
It's been a raining morning and it washed the haze away. Haze is back to the city yesterday.
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I am always that forgetful, playful and careless.
sigh!!
Not a good day when boss a bit stern to me. That's because I am wrong, I am too slow in helping him. I feel so down and useless. We are running out of time and I still need him to help me. I feel so bad especially he is not feeling well.
Tomorrow is our Independence Day but I think I should continue to work. I wanted to work now but when it is at night the internet is super slow.
Maybe I should really put in effort and make something works and happens.
I also forget to rely on God.
I am so sorry to everyone. I can't forgive myself.
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When someone asking me about S, I really have no idea what to reply because I really don't know how is he and what's he planning and going to do. All I can is to remain silent.
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I feel so lonely in the city alone. I wish to go back home any time soon but it seems to be impossible :| Missing my family and my hometown.
I need a shoulder to cry.. but I couldn't found any.
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How are you feeling today?
fannen is down.
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I am always that forgetful, playful and careless.
sigh!!
Not a good day when boss a bit stern to me. That's because I am wrong, I am too slow in helping him. I feel so down and useless. We are running out of time and I still need him to help me. I feel so bad especially he is not feeling well.
Tomorrow is our Independence Day but I think I should continue to work. I wanted to work now but when it is at night the internet is super slow.
Maybe I should really put in effort and make something works and happens.
I also forget to rely on God.
I am so sorry to everyone. I can't forgive myself.
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When someone asking me about S, I really have no idea what to reply because I really don't know how is he and what's he planning and going to do. All I can is to remain silent.
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I feel so lonely in the city alone. I wish to go back home any time soon but it seems to be impossible :| Missing my family and my hometown.
I need a shoulder to cry.. but I couldn't found any.
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How are you feeling today?
fannen is down.
Sunday, August 21, 2016
Contradict
I can't remember when is my favorite weekend. I mean Sunday only because Saturday will be whole day at church. My life is so boring now. Currently feel lonely, because I don't know what can I do.. I just hiding in my own small space, looking at YouTube and scrolling Facebook. I used to go for a walk and meet friends few years back, just hanging around and explore here and there. But, for now, no more..
Wanted to do something but I don't feel like going out.
This whole morning at church and we learned to cook healthy meal with simple and easy steps that makes me happy for a while but I am just too tired. Lol. I got to eat and eat. Help out here and there to makes myself feel busy.
What's your best kind of weekend? Mine is just boring for typical people.
I really admire those that had siblings and friends with them. At least weekend they are able to spend some bonding time. Me? Forget about it. Can't even think of anyone to chat as I know people do have their own families and friends as well.
Maybe it's time to live alone and not to rely on anyone. I am just not good at going out.
Boring blog.
Wanted to do something but I don't feel like going out.
This whole morning at church and we learned to cook healthy meal with simple and easy steps that makes me happy for a while but I am just too tired. Lol. I got to eat and eat. Help out here and there to makes myself feel busy.
What's your best kind of weekend? Mine is just boring for typical people.
I really admire those that had siblings and friends with them. At least weekend they are able to spend some bonding time. Me? Forget about it. Can't even think of anyone to chat as I know people do have their own families and friends as well.
Maybe it's time to live alone and not to rely on anyone. I am just not good at going out.
Boring blog.
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